January 20, 2009

Harvard, Cornell, Yale.

I’ve never wanted anything so badly other than these before.

I awake every morning, thinking of how to better my grades + plan my curriculum, find help from professors, how to write stronger, believe harder, which clubs to join to show my leadership or exercise my sportmanship. Do I swim for varsity? Join a drama theatrical club? Dance? Do they recognize the importance of an Organic Growing Club and how much it means to me, to practice planting food for the world? Will I be able to achieve a 4.0 GPA on my first semester even with one C for one of my Poetry homework. I’m paranoid, when everything’s nothing less than a perfect score.

How do I show and tell them, that I’m special and unique? I am meant for greatness, I know I am.

I want to make my parents & grandparents proud too, and be that example for my siblings.

God, please teach me how. How to love, above this all.